If a guy recently said that he does not know what he wants, this post will show you likely reasons why and what would make them more likely.

So, what does it mean when a guy says he does not know what he wants? Likely reasons why a guy will say that he does not know what he wants are that he is seeing other women, he is not very interested in you, or that he is actually doing it on purpose to raise your interest in him.

There are a number of possible reasons why a guy would say that he does not know what he wants but there are some things you can consider to help figure out the main cause.

What does it mean when a guy says he does not know what he wants?

Below are likely reasons why a guy will say that he does not know what he wants and what would make them more likely.

He is seeing other women

The reason might be that he is seeing other women. This would be more likely if you have seen him with other women, he often hesitates to agree to meeting up with you or he has said that he is seeing other women.

He is not sure where he will be in the future

It could also be the case that he is not sure that he is ready for a relationship. This would be more likely if he is likely to be moving away soon, he has recently left a relationship, or if he has said that he is not ready for one.

He likes being single

It could also be the case that he is not sure that he is ready for a relationship. This would be more likely if he is likely to be moving away soon, he has recently left a relationship, or if he has said that he is not ready for one.

He is not sure about you

It is also possible that he is not highly interested in you. This would be more likely if he often does not want to hang out with you, he takes a long time to respond to your messages, he rarely starts the conversation and he does not show a lot of interest when with you in person.

He is doing it on purpose

Sometimes, guys will say things like not knowing what they want on purpose to make you think about them more and to get you to try and chase their validation. It could be the case that he has been doing it to you on purpose. This would be more likely if he does show interest in you eventually.

In this case, it would be likely that he would show signs of being interested in you, in his body language by doing things such as:

  • Pupil dilation when talking to you
  • Pointing his feet towards you
  • Talking to you more than others
  • Asking your friends about you
  • Maintaining a longer duration of eye contact
  • Touching you the most
  • Mirroring your body language and behavior
  • Standing at a closer proximity to you
  • Following you around
  • Giving lots of glances your way
  • Speaking with a deeper voice than normal around you
  • Getting anxious when you’re with other men

Things to consider

Below are things to consider to help figure out the main reason why he would say it.

How he reacts when he sees you

To help in figuring out the way he feels about you, it would help to consider the way he reacts when he sees you.

If he reacts to seeing you by doing things such as:

  • Adjusting his appearance
  • Holding eye contact with you
  • Moving closer to you
  • Adjusting his posture
  • Facing towards you (especially with his feet)

It would be likely that he is interested in you.

Whereas, if he reacts to seeing you by doing things such as:

  • Avoiding eye contact
  • Crossing his arms
  • Moving away
  • Squinting
  • Tensing the jaw

Then it would be more likely that he is annoyed with you.

How he behaves with other people

Another thing to consider would be if he behaves differently with other people than he does with you.

If he shows different body language with you than he does with his other friends and he does things such as look at you the most, stand nearest to you or get jealous when you talk to other men, it would be more likely he is attracted to you.

Whereas, if he interacts with you in the same way he does with his other friends, it would be more likely that he considers you a friend and he is not actually trying to be hot and cold.

Multiple signs

When considering his body language, it would help to consider multiple signs at a time. The reason for this is that a single body language sign is not very reliable by itself. However, multiple signs that all suggest the same thing are a lot more reliable.

If you want to learn more about body language, a book I would recommend would be The Definitive Book of Body Language (on Amazon). It shows you how to interpret body language and understand people's true intentions.

Author

I created and currently manage Body Language Central, one of the premier sources for body language-related knowledge. Body language plays a key role in our daily lives. I hope that my website can help condense the wide amount of body language information available and allow you to make full use of it in your daily life. You can read more about me and my website here.