If a girl recently touched you on the shoulder then you might be wondering why and what it might mean about the way that she feels about you.

This post will help you understand why she might have touched you on the shoulder and why other girls might do it as well in the future.

So, what does it mean when a girl touches you on the shoulder? If she does it multiple times and she shows other signs of attraction then it would be a sign that she is attracted to you. It could also be that she is trying to reassure you, she’s trying to get your attention or she does it naturally with most people.

Since there are a number of reasons why a girl will touch you on the shoulder it is important to consider the body language that she showed and the context of how she did it.

Why a girl will touch your shoulder

Each of the different reasons why a girl will touch you on the shoulder will likely come with a number of clues in her body language and in the context of how she did it.

In the following sections, I will show you a number of reasons why a girl will touch your shoulder, the signs to look for and the things to consider.

She’s attracted to you

The reason that she touched you on the shoulder could be that she was showing that she is attracted to you.

This would be more likely if she touched you on the shoulder repeatedly, if she was doing it while you were alone together, she is a similar age as you and if she was showing positive body language that she doesn’t with her other friends.

If she did touch your shoulder due to being attracted to you then it would be likely that she would show other body language signs of attraction around you.

These signs can include:

  • Standing closer to you, when talking to you, than she does with other people
  • Brushing her hair to the side when she is around you
  • Stroking her hair while talking to you
  • Asking you lots of questions and giving you more attention than she does to other people
  • Pointing her feet at you when she is around you
  • Holding prolonged eye contact with you
  • Having dilated pupils when looking at you
  • Touching your feet with her feet
  • Laughing and looking to see if you are also laughing
  • Laughing a lot at the things that you say
  • Adjusting her appearance when she sees you
  • Talking to you at a higher pitch than she does with other people
  • Tilting her head while talking to you

She wanted your attention

The reason that she tapped you on the shoulder could be that she was just trying to get your attention.

This would be most likely if she tapped you on the shoulder before she started speaking to you and while you were not looking at her. It would also be more likely if she didn’t tap your shoulder again after that.

If she continued to tap you on the shoulder while talking to you then it would be more of a sign that she was showing interest in you.

It could also be the case that she was tapping you on the shoulder to get your attention but she was also attracted to you. If that was the case then it would be likely that she would have shown other signs of attraction while talking to you.

She was mirroring you

When a person is trying to fit in with a certain group of people he/she will often begin to mirror the behavior and body language of the people in the group.

If you have touched her on the shoulder in the past and you both tend to hang out with the same people then it could have been the case that she was mirroring you.

Mirroring can also be a sign of attraction. If she was mirroring you due to attraction then it would be likely that she would show other signs of attraction around you.

If she was mirroring you then she might have mirrored you in other ways as well by doing things such as:

  • Mirroring your facial gestures
  • Mirroring your hand gestures
  • Talking at a similar speed as you
  • Standing with the same stance as you

She was trying to reassure you

It could have been the case that she touched you on the shoulder because she was trying to make you feel better.

If she was then it would be likely that you were talking to her about something that made you feel sad and that you would have shown signs of being sad. If she was trying to reassure you then she might have done other things to reassure you as well such as to pat your pat or to say reassuring things.

It’s normal in her culture

In some cultures, it is normal for people to touch each other a lot while talking.

If she is from one of these cultures then it could have been the case that she touched you on the shoulder naturally. If that was the case then it would be likely that she would also touch other people in a similar way as well.

If she does do it naturally then it could still be the case that she is attracted to you. If she is then she would likely show other signs of attraction around you.

Consider your relationship with her

The type of relationship that you have with her would be a useful thing to consider when trying to understand why she touched you on the shoulder.

If she has been your friend for a while then it would be more likely that she was either trying to get your attention, showing attraction or she was trying to reassure you. It would be helpful to consider how much she touched your shoulder, the timing of when she did it and the body language that she was showing.

If she was a girl that you hadn’t met before then it would be more likely that she was either showing attraction to you, doing it naturally or that she was trying to get your attention. It would help to consider how she was interacting with other people, how many times she touched your shoulder and the body language that she was showing.

Think about when and where she did it

The timing and location of where she touched your shoulder would also be a useful thing to consider.

If she touched your shoulder when you were alone together then it would be more likely that she was either showing attraction or she was trying to reassure you. It would be helpful to consider the way she did it and the body language she was showing.

If she touched your shoulder when you were with other people then it would be more likely that she was either doing it naturally or to get your attention.

Consider how she reacts to seeing you

Thinking about the way that she reacts to seeing you would also be a useful thing to do in figuring out why she touched your shoulder.

If she reacts to seeing you by noticeably changing her body language in a positive way then it would be more likely that she is attracted to you.

This means that if she reacts to seeing you by doing things such as:

  • Brushing her hair to the side
  • Raising her eyebrows and smiling
  • Pointing her feet at you
  • Positioning herself to be nearer to you
  • Adjusting her appearance
  • Watching you as you enter

Then it would be more likely that she touched your shoulder due to being attracted to you.

Consider how she interacts with others

Comparing the way she interacts with you with how she interacts with others would also likely be helpful in determining why she touched your shoulder.

If she touches other people’s shoulders and she shows the same body language around them as she does with you then it would be more likely that she touched your shoulder naturally.

Whereas, if she only did it to you and she changes her body language around you in a positive way then it would be more likely that she was showing attraction.

Look for multiple signs in her body language

When considering what her body language could have been showing it would be helpful to consider multiple body language signs at a time.

If she was showing multiple body language signs of attraction then it would be more likely that she was showing them due to being attracted to you.

Whereas, if she only showed one sign of attraction then it would be much more difficult to understand since single body language signs normally have multiple different possible meanings.

If you want to learn more about body language, a book I would recommend would be The Definitive Book of Body Language (on Amazon). It shows you how to interpret body language and understand people's true intentions.

Author

I created and currently manage Body Language Central, one of the premier sources for body language-related knowledge. Body language plays a key role in our daily lives. I hope that my website can help condense the wide amount of body language information available and allow you to make full use of it in your daily life. You can read more about me and my website here.