If you have recently noticed a guy put his arm around the back of your chair then you’re probably wondering why he did it and what it might mean.
This post will help you figure out why a guy might put his arm around the back of your chair and help you figure it out when it happens in the future.
So, what does it mean when a guy puts his arm around the back of your chair? Possible causes of a guy putting his arm around the back of your chair are that he is attracted to you or that he is being dominant.
Since there are a number of reasons why a guy might put his arm around the back of your chair it would help to consider the body language signals that he shows around you.
By doing so you’ll be able to get a better understanding of the motivations that he had behind putting his arm around the back of your chair.
Why a guy will put his arm around the back of your chair
Each of the different reasons why a guy will put his arm around the back of your chair will likely come with a number of clues in his body language.
Below, I will show you a number of reasons why a guy will put his arm around the back of your chair and the body language signals to look for.
He’s attracted to you
If he only puts his arm around the back of your chair and he doesn’t do it with other women then it would make it more likely that he does it because he’s attracted to you.
If he does put his arm around your chair because he’s attracted to you then it would be likely that he would show it in a number of different ways in his body language.
These ways can include:
- Holding eye contact with you for longer than normal
- Having dilated pupils when talking to you
- Staring at you and then quickly looking away when you notice
- Pointing his feet at you even when he isn’t directly facing you
- Laughing and looking to see if you are
- Getting anxious when you’re with other men
- Getting defensive when other men are around
- Showing signs of nervousness when with you
- Adjusting his hair or clothing when he first notices you
- Mirroring your body language
- Speaking more deeply than normal
- Blinking more frequently than normal when talking to you
- A lack of negative signals such as squinting, tightening the lips or crossing the arms and legs
- Standing near you when talking to you
- Positioning himself to be close to you
- Looking at your lips
He’s being dominant
When a man is trying to show that he is the dominant person in a group he will often touch those around him.
Unless the guy that put his arm around your chair is your boyfriend it would be likely that it was a dominating gesture.
It is possible that he was being dominant and that he is attracted to you. If he was then he would show signs of both dominance and attraction in his body language.
If he was being dominant then it would be likely that he would show multiple other signs of being dominant in his body language and behavior.
These signs can include:
- Putting his hands and feet on things that aren’t his (including people)
- Taking up lots of space
- Standing and sitting in a way that makes his body appear larger
- Positioning himself to be at the center of things
- Talking over people
- Talking loudly
- Interrupting people
- Tight lips
- Tight jaw
- Tightening of the eyebrows when talking to you
He wants to be more than just friends
If he has been your friend for a while and he hasn’t put his arm around the back of your chair before then it would make it likely that he wants more than just a friendship.
If that is the case then he would likely show you multiple signs of attraction in his body language that you haven’t picked up on.
Since he hasn’t overtly told you that he wants more than just a friendship it would be especially likely that he would show signs of nervousness around you.
Other tell-tale signs would be if he gets anxious when you’re around other men, getting defensive around other men and if he holds eye contact with you for longer than normal.
He wants to see how you’ll react
It could also be the case that he is attracted to you but he isn’t sure of whether or not you find him attractive.
This could mean that he put his arm around your chair to see if you would react favorably.
Again if that was the case then it would be likely that he would show multiple signs of attraction in his behavior and body language.
Consider his normal behavior
When trying to figure out why a guy might have shown a certain body language signal it would usually be helpful to consider what his normal body language looks like.
If he seems to do it when he’s sitting next to other women and his body language doesn’t change much around you then it would be more likely that he has a more dominating personality. However, it would suggest that they are targeting it at you specifically.
Yet, if it is just you that he does it with and his body language changes around you then it would make it more likely that he’s attracted to you.
Consider your relationship with him
It would also help to consider the type of relationship that you have with him.
If you have been dating him for a while then it would suggest that he wants to move the relationship further.
If he has been your friend for a while it would suggest that he wants to have more than just a friendship (unless he shows signs of dominance).
If it was a guy that you hadn’t met before then it would be more likely that he either has a dominating personality or that he was attracted to you or both.
Think about groups of body language signals
When you’re trying to figure out why he put his arm around the back of your chair make sure to consider multiple body language signals at a time.
There are often a number of different reasons that someone might show one particular body language signal. However, when there are multiple body language signals all pointing towards the same thing it would make it much more likely that they are showing those body language signals for that reason.
If you want to learn more about body language, a book I would recommend would be The Definitive Book of Body Language (on Amazon). It shows you how to interpret body language and understand people's true intentions.